Wednesday, April 17, 2013

30 Top Stripper Songs Vol.??

  1.  Persia White- Shadows
  2. Feist-Black Tongue (Cover)
  3. Led Zeppelin-Dazed And Confused
  4. Yeah Whatever-What U Need (you know how hard it is to find this song?? there isn't even a link)
  5. Laika-Black Cat Bone
  6. Morcheeba-Never An Easy Way
  7. Massive Attack-Black Milk
  8. 2Wicky-Hooverphonic
  9. aTelecine (did you know Sasha Grey was in a band?)-I Came I Sat I Departed
  10. Lana Del Rey-Off To The Races
  11. The Hole Soundtrack - Main Theme
  12. The Neighbourhood-Female Robbery
  13. Dinah Washington-Cry Me A River1959 (Truth  Soul Remix)
  14. GHXST-Devil Between Us
  15. GHXST-Dragula (Rob Zombie Cover)
  16. Pantera-Avoid The Light
  17. Joe Tex-Sassy Sexy Wiggle
  18. Black Mountain-Wucan
  19. Lana Del Rey-Burning Desire
  20. The Neighbourhood-A Little Death
  21. Kevin Rudolf-In The City
  22. Depeche Mode-Dirt
  23. Der Fluch-Hexen Leben Länger
  24. Howl Baby Howl-Devil's Love Song
  25. HTRK-Ha
  26. Rihanna-Jump
  27. Massive Attack-Angel
  28. Ray J- I Hit it First JUST KIDDING
  29. Of Verona-Dark In My Imagination
  30. GHXST-Shallow
So wow I haven't done a song post in a year.. Time flies when your not having fun.. So here is something extra! Mega new list , double the usual number! So girls and boys get on the pole and make your parents proud.

By the way unrelated plug:  for cute edgy affordable high fashion jewelry visit BLK AND NOIR

Friday, January 4, 2013

Darkly Jewels: BLK AND NOIR JEWELRY

)oh yes and I will be coming back with another infamous musical playlist )


I really like this new jewelry store I found called BLK and NOIR jewelry. It has my favorites like cross and skull jewelry. Some of it simple, some is very edgy, a bit gothic but I would say kind of DARK.. but the name is BLK and NOIR (black and black, noir is french for black), so what do you expect??? Anyways here are my two favorite pieces..I look forward to seeing more, and hope for some of my sold out favs to come out !

BTW  did you notice that some of this jewelry is named after vampires??
Memento Mori III Skull Bangle

Angelus Large Silver Wings Necklace

(if you didn't know, Angelus is the name of "the vampire with a soul" Angel from the 90s series Buffy the Vampire Slayer. HA!)



Saturday, March 10, 2012

Top Stripper Songs Playlist Vol. 8

You asked for it! and Now its back, The Ultimate Stripper Playlist strikes back!... I believe this is volume 8 or 9? I decide to take another darker but electric + rock + trip hop approach!
Anyways, Lets get down and dirty!


1.Rihanna-Birthday Cake
2.Rob Zombie-Living Dead Girl (Naked Exorcism Mix)
3.Iggy Azalea-PU$$Y
4.Mastodon-Black Tongue
5.Massive Attack-Special Cases
6.Portishead-Only You
7.Death In Vegas-Soul Auctioneer
8.Project 86 - PS
9.Karen O w/ Trent Reznor & Atticus Ross-Immigrant Song
10.Danzig-Underbelly Of The Beast
11.The Infidels feat.  Juliette Lewis-Bad Brother
12.Monster Magnet-Big God
13.Sin-Painful
14.Stabbing Westward-Waking Up Beside You (Remix)
15.The Raveonettes- War In Heaven
16.Ministry-Hizbollah
17.Aaliyah-What If
18.Rihanna-Cockiness (Love it)
19.Zebra Katz- Ima Read
20.DJ Bahler-Sparrow's Fall [School of Seven Bells + KoRn + Skrillex + Kill the Noise]
21.KoRn-Twisted Transistor
22. Tricky-Antihistamine

Monday, January 16, 2012

New Hobby...Maybe Business Venture?

This blog gets more hits than my other blog, even though I only update this blog like 7 times  a year.. But publicitiy, publicity... Here it goes ....

-------
I have always been an arts and crafts kinda girl! So I found a new hobby! Making jewelry!Its so much fun to me and therapeutic ! I also like scoping out jewelry from thrift shops and flea market... I sell some of it and make some of it for my family and friends. It is fun to do and if I make a little money on it, thats fun too!


kind of obsessed with crosses and skulls as you can see!
Does anyone wanna buy? I'm working from Etsy and a little shop online but I also can send invoices if you see anything you like! 
Oh yea I'm on Instagram! (name: myroomiswhite)
Did I mention I moved my photography website to cargocollective (i'll just put it in another post) 

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Lets Talk About It:The Twilight Saga



SPOILER ALERT: STOP READING RIGHT NOW OR YOU WILL BE VERY SAD.

Yes, I like Twilight...Go ahead, judge me! But there is some confusion to men and certain women on why the masses love Twilight..I am here to break it down for you in a way I have yet to hear explained.

It's a fantasy, not just any fantasy but a fantasy with no consequences. A fantasy with so much to gain in the end without really losing anything. Here we have a plain Jane with no personality, who gets picked by the most beautiful and richest guy who happens to be immortal guy. It gives a chance to a lot of girls to believe that you don't have to be special,interesting or even beautiful to be chosen by the "perfect guy". Not to mention there is tons of hot wolves and hotter vampires who are willing to risk everything for this one girl who isn't even special. Also, because its a great distraction from the reality of the world. A place where war,violence,greed,racism,rape,murder,death,poverty and misfortune happens non-stop, it is nice to get away from how fucked we truly are(hence the title of this blog).

Bella doesn't really loose much at all.. Unlike other series like say Harry Potter where both of your parents are slaughtered and some of your friends by pure evil ; or Vampire Diaries where Elena Gilbert's adopted parents, real parents and last living guardian are all killed by the result of vampirism; or other series where you have to sacrifice family,friends,home,mind,well being just to have a good end ---Bella gets to have it all. She gets to be what everyone is searching for and have been searching for since the beginning of time: eternal youth,beauty,money and love (yes, like Ponce de Leon didn't just search the globe for the "Fountain of Youth"; or there isn't countless advertising on how to be beautiful; or how people try to do things to become rich like playing the lottery every week; or like most songs,books,movies aren't about love).

Oh sure, she started to give birth to a demon spawn who eventually killed her horrifically (like she wasn't going to have to die anyway) but even the demon spawn got be a perfect little hybrid. She doesn't loose her dad because he is okay with her being a vampire (or ignores it all together) as well as keeping her immortal family. She gets to even keep Jacob around, in a creepy way but he will still be around like she wanted. No one dies or suffers that Bella cares about, its just all falls into place. In addition, being a newborn vampire she doesn't even have a struggle with bloodlust. She just magically adapts perfectly her "vegetarian" blood diet (ughhh I didn't like that Stephenie Meyer). Newborn bloodlust isn't suppose to be easy, it should take massive training according to the preceding books(Jasper anyone?). Finally, instead of the massive war with the Volturi that is suppose to happen (and carries on for 100-200 pages) it doesn't! The Volturi backs down because once again vampires from all over the world are willing to help this one un-special girl.

So this is the reason girls/people love The Twilight Saga.. She gets everything she wants and everything works in her favor --no matter what.There is no real responsibility for her actions. I don't know about you but  I may not want to be a the main character of a book/film/tv if that meant lots of people I loved had to die. I might have to think about it. But who has to think about gaining beauty,youth,happiness and money for all eternity with no real trade offs ? Not many people.


A review of the movie:
I will say the movie was better than I thought it would be. Usually I hate the movies because they never follow the book(not since the first movie). However, I was actually pleasantly surprised it did. I think they may have skipped a few sex scenes but apparently America is more afraid of sex than graphic gore.

Likes:
1.The birth scene
was horrifying and that's great.It could have been more graphic but somehow I thought they would skip this all together so I was grateful for ANYTHING. Since in the other films they took blood scenes and made them not bloody (-_-) it was nice to see actual blood IN A VAMPIRE MOVIE.. It (almost) helped that the music was all happy and then it slid right into SAW III. I wasn't expecting it at all. It saved the movie for me, because I almost disliked the whole film until that scene.

2.Bella's transformation
was beautiful with her human life flashing before her eyes. It was nice they played her actual Lullaby Theme, instead of leaving it out. Also, I wondered why at first Bella looked so sickly (even before the baby). Once she was pregnant she looked like emancipated DEATH warmed up. SHE LOOKED HORRIBLE.There was nothing glamorous or redeeming about the way she looked! Finally, she transformed into a vampire. Bella went from looking like she escaped Michael Jackson's Thriller to her looking like she had an eternal gift card to Sephora.

3.The way they handle the Jacob pedophilia part(LOL!).
I had no idea how they were going to handle the imprinting of man to a baby but they did it. By showing Reneseme as an adult/teen as soon as he imprinted, you almost forget that she is still a baby and he's a grown ass man(or teen?). But it was also a beautiful flash forward with all the music,her voice and seeing her as an adult/teen. Surprising it was all CGI-ed versions of her. I thought those were real people, but nope all computerized.

Dislikes: 
1.I hated the background music. There was this annoying ass background music that made the movie seem like a soap opera. The music was a bit too happy. Was that in the preceding movies? Breaking Dawn is the darkest of the series so why is this so happy? I mean, we're talking about a vampire baby crushing you from the inside out. Do I really need to feel like I'm on a happy ride up an elevator?

2.The acting. I know that Kirsten Stewart and Robert Pattinson can act. I have seen numerous films with them in it. Yet they seemed bored, uninterested or like they were just reading their lines. The seemed passive and almost un-phased that their beloved Bella was about to be sucked dry by her own fetus. This is the first time I noticed this out of all the films.

3. At some points I felt like I was watching the Power Rangers. When the wolf pack met up and we're reading each other minds I was just like DEAR GOD WHY???WHO SAID THIS WAS OKAY?? I was just waiting for Jacob to say "GO GO POWER RANGERS TO KILL BELLA-YOU CAN NOT STOP ME.. AH-HA".. It had this cartoon feel.. You know--the cartoons you can catch on a Saturday morning...Weird......

Anyways I still liked the movie (thanks to the last 30 minutes redeeming the whole thing). This is the first movie I have liked since the first one (Catherine Hardwicke, girl you had it right). I look forward to the next one.

*UPDATE: I just realized that Edward Cullen didn't sparkle in Breaking Dawn Part I. Which I guess is fine but be consistent. If he's going to sparkle in all the films and books, he or at least vampire Bella should have at least sparkled just a little.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

My 6 Favorite "Smells Like Teen Spirit" Covers and Remixes


I love Nirvana and Kurt Cobain.. I have tons of remixes and covers of "Smells Like Teen Spirit" as well as other songs...Here are my 6 favorite...

1.J*DaVeY

2..Sungha Jung

3.Pretty Lights vs Radiohead vs Nirvana vs NIN

4.Mighty Mike- Calvin Harris vs. Nirvana

5..Mujuice vs. Tori Amos

6.Winter Gloves

Monday, October 10, 2011

How To Have A Quarter Life Crisis

You've you just graduated college. Now you're broke,jobless,friendless and have no reason to live. Well have no fear I have made you a movie playlist to make you feel better, well at least for 2 hours each. These movies are Hollywood's version of what you're going through but your life isn't as promising and interesting as these movies may be. Well lets carry on with the 20's suckfest shall we?

1.Fight Club 

Everyone has seen this right? Everyone except for me up to the year 2011. A friend tried to persuade to me watch it in 2009, but with seeing a picture of pink soap on the cover I was like sorry no... well lucky I didn't because I wouldn't have appreciate how close I was to the Narrator (main character who is unnamed).... too bad Tyler Durden won't come to save me from my mental hell I have created for myself, but I do have false hope he will.. Maybe for you too..Probably not

2.Lost In Translation

You probably aren't in Toyko with the whole city in your backyard of your hotel but you can pretend. This movie is as boringly as my life is right now so I can accept the pace. Besides I love Sofia Coppola even though her movies are like great sex with no climax... (Yes i mean there is usually no climax it kind of just ends..)

3.It's Kind of A Funny Story

Though it stars teens, they are in an adult mental ward so its all fair game. Unrealistic as going to a mental ward and finding love,friends and happiness all in one place is ...someone wrote a book and film while adding an indie soundtrack to it making it all possible. And I can relate to Craig, the main character who initally decides to jump off a bridge.

Hope you enjoyed a list other then music for strippers to grind to.. If you didn't well fuck you too. Goodnight

Monday, August 1, 2011

I'm Back Again...Another Stripper Playlist vol. 7


well the last time i posted was in May...and some how I thought I had just posted it yesterday! Oh my how does time pass when your depressed and suicidual! anyways this list is darker and grittier you will ENJOY!
(click songs to hear them)
  1. Ruby-Flippin' tha Bird (Ceasefire Remix)
  2.  Love & Rockets-This Heaven
  3. Meat Beat Manifesto- Paradise Now [Remix]
  4. Fever Ray - The Wolf
  5. The Kills-Superstition
  6. Madonna-Justify My Love
  7. Fever Ray - Keep The Streets Empty For Me
  8. Massive Attack-Teardrop
  9. Dylan Dray-Pretty Things
  10. Bigod-One (The Jack Dangers Full on Mix) (sorry the link turned into spam)
  11. Pretty Lights-Pretty Lights vs Radiohead vs Nirvana vs NIN
  12. Chester Bennington- System
  13. KoRn-Forsaken
  14. Emily Browning-Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)
  15.  Le Disko - Shiny Toy Guns
  16. Jigglin - Ying Yang Twins
  17. The Kills-U.R.A. Fever
  18. Between Walls-Gray Tone To Halftone
  19. Filter-Hey Man Nice Shot
  20. Rihanna-Man Down

Friday, May 27, 2011

Top 16 Stripper Songs Vol.6

I am back doing my usual..helping strippers dance to good music.....So here we go... !
 (click song to hear)

if i think of more i will add to this list..until next time...byeeee

Monday, March 14, 2011

Announcement

I realize that when I started this blog that was a great idea but now I realize maybe it wasn't so much. Yes I get a thousands views a day but its a bit bitter sweet because I realize I should have gone in a different, more beneficial way.. I don't know what I expected from this blog, I really don't. But I no longer care about it. I am not shutting it down as I will continue with my most popular posts, but I have moved on to another blog  ---the blog I should have started 4 years ago instead of this one.With that being said, if you would like to move on with me,my newer blog is :



 Otherwise look out for the next post on this blog... it maybe a while...

Friday, October 22, 2010

You Asked For It! Top 21 Stripper Songs Vol. 5

Yeah... I think people only care about my most popular post which is the Top Stripper Songs so I'm gonna give the people what they want...Here we go again.. This one was handpicked by me and is much darker I guess just in time for Halloween...Whatever enjoy ? Enjoy
(click on titles to hear songs)
picture source


1. Nine Inch Nails- Closer
2. Marilyn Manson- The Dope Show
3. The Dead Weather- Rocking Horse
4.The Dead Weather - I Can't Hear You
5. The Tea Party- Temptation
6.Dorion feat. B-Rad & Jenny O)-Somewhere
7. The Dead Weather- No Hassle Night
8.Otep- Head of Medusa       (True Blood Clip)
9. The Velvet Underground- Oh Sweet Nuthin'
10.Mastretta- Nadie  (Radeo Suicide Clip)
11.Marvin Gaye/Theophilus London- I Want You
12, Rob Zombie- Living Dead Girl
13. ISIS- 20 Minutes/40 Years
14.Portishead - Glory Box
15. MC5-It's A Man's Man's Man's World
16.KoRn- Freak On A Leash
17. Deftones - No Ordinary Love
18.Funkadelic - Maggot Brain
19. Credence Clearwater Revival- I Put A Spell On You
20. The Black Keys- Lies 
21.Grinderman-Heathen Child


Thursday, September 16, 2010

NYC: Let Me Read My Book and Pretend I Don't See What Is It You're Doing List

When you live in New York City, 9 times of 10 you're going to have to ride some form of mass transportation ...And if you aren't,then this is probably irrelevant for you to read any further... For anyone who hasn't rode a subway in New York, believe me there are some things you just don't want to see..And this is why all 100% of the people on the train either look like they are on the way to hell or engulfed in some "great" novel...Why you may ask? BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE CRAZY and you have to pretend like some stuff that's going on is not even there... like you don't see that drug addict right in front of you ---taking a shit..(think this is drastic...you haven't seen nothing yet)... So if you're a New Yorker or someone riding a subway...Here is 5 good books you could pretend or actually read while someone screaming gibberish rolling on the subway floor in front of you.

1.Prozac Nation by Elizabeth Wurtzel

autobiography published in 1994 and describes the author's experiences with major depression.

2.The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold

It is the story of a teenage girl who, after being raped and murdered, watches from heaven as her family and friends go on with their lives while she herself comes to terms with her own death.

3.The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson
It s about the disappearance forty years ago of Harriet Vanger, a young scion of one of the wealthiest families in Sweden . . . and about her octogenarian uncle, determined to know the truth about what he believes was her murder. 

4.Let The Right One In by John Ajvide Lindqvist
 a 2004 vampire fiction novel by Swedish writer John Ajvide Lindqvist. The story centers on the relationship between a 12-year-old boy, Oskar, and a centuries-old vampire child, Eli.

5.Youth In Revolt C. D. Payne.
the journals of Nick Twisp, California's most precocious diarist, whose ongoing struggles to make sense out of high school, deal with his divorced parents, and lose his virginity result in his transformation from an unassuming fourteen-year-old to a modern youth in open revolt.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

The Fork In The Road Movie List

There is always that point in your life when you have to make a decision...Either you're graduation from high school or college, about to get married or even just finding yourself...And sometimes its not even that..you've just woken up this morning and realized "I'm not where I want to be in life.." Well I have compiled a list of 5 movies that could in fact help you in that time of unsureness.

Lost In Translation (2002)

Away We Go(2009)

Prozac Nation(2001)


Eat,Love,Pray

Pursuit of Happiness(2006)

Friday, August 20, 2010

TIME's Top 10 Things Today's Kids Will Never Experience

  1. Camera Film - Gone are the days of hearing the film rewind into its casing, transporting it to a photo lab and patiently waiting to find out how amateurish your snapshots look. 
  2. Landline Phones - For most young folks, the only way they will own a landline phone is if cell reception is bad at home or if a cable triple-play package is more cost effective.
  3. Real Books - More and more people are reading ebooks, with sales of electronic editions besting hardcovers for the first time this summer. The iPad is set to further challenge the physical book’s 600-year reign.
  4. Being Lost - The days of asking for directions are done. Smart phones make life so easy. Now countless apps can utilize GPS technology to pinpoint your location and direct you to your desired locale with ease and precision. 
  5. Music Videos on MTV - The television station once famous for forward-thinking music video shows like 120 Minutes and Alternative Nation — even the early years of Total Request Live — now can largely be summed up in three words: gym, tan, laundry. What happened?
  6. Walkmans - Yesteryear’s Walkmans were indispensable, allowing us to take our beloved mix tapes everywhere. But the equipment was overthrown. First came the Discman, then the iPod. A new vocabulary developed—”MP3s,” “iTunes playlists”—and before you could hit pause, words like “rewind” had lost all meaning.
  7. The Glory Days of Nick at Nite - Traditionally, Nick at Nite was the place for the classics: The Mary Tyler Moore Show, Bewitched, I Dream of Jeannie, The Dick Van Dyke Show, The Munsters and later The Brady Bunch, Happy Days and The Wonder Years and more. That was then. Since, the network has made a switch to contemporary shows like George Lopez, Malcolm in the Middle and Everybody Hates Chris. Classics? I think not.
  8. Tan M&Ms - If you were born in or before the 1980s and your parents allowed you to eat candy, chances are good that you encountered tan M&Ms. But for those of you who had your first chocolate experience in the mid-90s, you will probably know the current M&M color line up, which includes the color blue.
  9. Czechoslovakia - Oh Czechoslovakia, we hardly knew you. You seem now a faraway land, your name tripping off the tongue. What kid these days will think of your triumphant soccer teams, your famous dissidents? Will they remember a time when an Iron Curtain fell across the West? Will they know what it was like when the battle for democracy was finally won? And will they lament the ethnic nationalism that, in 1993, ultimately cut you in half? No, they won’t. They’ll just visit Prague, pretend to read Milan Kundera, and drink all your cheap beer.
  10. Arnold Schwarzenegger, the Terminator - Before he was elected Governor of California in 2003, Arnold Schwarzenegger had a long history of being buff, tough and dangerous — at least on screen. The Austrian-born politician started out as a bodybuilder, winning four Mr. Universe titles as well as an amateur title in the contest. He was unforgettable as the Terminator (which of course got him his nickname the Governator).
(via TIME.com)
 The Decline of Western Civilization [VHS]

Thursday, August 5, 2010

10 Ways to Avoid Hipster Baby Names


WELL CALL ME A HIPSTER BECAUSE RIGHT BEFORE I READ THIS ARTICLE I BROKE PRETTY MUCH ALL OF THESE RULES AS IDEA FOR FUTURE KIDS NAMES:

(via the daily beast)

Want to avoid choosing a name that might make you—not to mention your innocent child—a hipster cliché? For specific Hipster Names to steer clear of, consult the list on Nameberry. And because hipster style is an ever-shifting target, be sure to follow these 10 Simple Rules for not giving your baby a hipster name:

1. DON’T NAME YOUR BABY AFTER A JAZZ MUSICIAN. No Ella, no Ray, no Miles. Nix on Billie, nyet on Bessie, never on Duke. And did you really think you were going to get away with Thelonious or Django? No and no. Lionel, however, is still genuinely cool.

2. NO NAMES OF GODS AND GODDESSES. We can blame the ultimate cool mommy blogger Dooce for this one. Her daughter is named Leta, which is derived from Leda, who was the mythological mother of Helen of Troy. And then, at the farmers’ market in Madison, Wisconsin, we heard a hipster dad calling to his toddler son, “Stop right there, Odin!” Zeus, Jupiter, Andromeda, and Pandora are all similarly hipster heaven.

3. AVOID THE NAMES OF HIGH-FALUTIN’ LITERARY CHARACTERS. Atticus, anyone? The more obscure and high-minded the character, the more hipster-worthy the name. So you’ll have to stay away from Scout, Daisy, Maisie, Holden and Gulliver. Soap opera character names remain safe if otherwise repellent bets.

4. AVOID THE NAMES OF HIGH-FALUTIN’ WRITERS. This is kind of a thin line. We’d say Auden, Austen, Flannery, Harper, Tennessee and Tennyson are dripping in hipsterdom; Edith, Eudora, and Ellison, still okay.

5. NO NAMES YOU MIGHT USE FOR A DOG. Prince, Duke, Max, Fifi: This kind of I’m-so-cool-I-don’t-care name should not be used for a human, even one you make yourself. Likewise do not name your dog Marian, Frederick, or Patricia.

6. IF A SUPERMODEL WOULD CHOOSE THIS NAME FOR HER BABY, STAY AWAY. Along with four-foot-long legs and cheekbones as wide as their shoulders, supermodels seem congenitally hip, and inevitably choose hipster names for their babies. (Yes, all supermodels seem to have babies.) Nameberry has a list of Supermodel Baby Names, which run toward choices such as Neva, Presley, and Sahteene.

7. SIMILARLY AVOID NAMES CHOSEN BY HIPSTER CELEBRITIES. Matilda hits the hipster list because it was chosen by hipster parents Heath and Michelle. Romy is Sofia Coppolla’s pick and Roman Cate Blanchett’s; Ramona is Maggie Gyllenhaal’s choice and Moses is Gwynnie’s. While you’re at it, you should probably not use names of hipster celebrities themselves: Isla, Ewan, Scarlett.

8. STAY AWAY FROM NAMES OF PLACES YOU WOULD NEVER GO. Okay, so Savannah and London are overplayed. Hipster parents have therefore decamped to Alabama, Indiana, and Reno. And from there it’s all too easy to wander from hipster turf into maverick territory: right, Bristol Palin?

9. DON’T PICK ANY NAME THAT STARTS WITH I OR Z OR ENDS WITH X OR O. If this whole issue is way too confusing for you, just following this one simple rule and you should be all right. Forget Iris and Isaiah. Zoe and Zane. Pax and Maddox. Nico and Orlando. Done.

10. FORGET ALL HIGHLY UNFASHIONABLE AND HIDEOUSLY UGLY NAMES. One earmark (Hi, John McCain) of hipsterism is being so hip you can be totally unhip, so cool you can give your kid a name that’s entirely uncool. Like Edna. Or Ignatius. Or Myrtle. But as important as it may seem to avoid names that threaten to turn you into a hipster cliché, it’s even more essential to stay away from those that might make your teenager try to kill you while you sleep.